Listen to the eyes

It is 3am and again I am awake wishing I was asleep. Life can be heard in a persons eyes. Over the last couple of weeks my job has been a roller coaster ride. Staff and patients appear stressed beyond consolation. I am not sure if this level of anxiety is due to the holiday season or the bad economy or who knows. But I do know that at my job we have suffered great loss. One of our employees was murdered by another employee. In addition to this horrific loss many co-workers have loss their loved ones. You can see the pain and heart break in the eyes of our employees.
What part of a persons soul is so lost that they would run someone over with their car? Every day we care for the sick we care for our soliders who gave their lives so we can have freedom. Why is there so much rage and hate when we have so much to be grateful for?

In contrast another co worker on the same day had her life shattered by fire and the loss of her husband. Her life will forever be changed . This weekend we will have another funeral to attend. We have to support each other.

Other co workers this month have lost their husbands ,their fathers, their children and other family as well.
I felt today that we needed and entire hospital prayer service.
These losses hurt and drain the spirit. They bring back painful memories of each of our personal losses.

Loss to violence effects our ability to feel safe. We step out on faith daily .
Every day wake up put the coffee on get dressed and head out to work , that routine is repeated over and over each day each week. Do we wonder if we will come back home?

When I stopped working in the ER and working night shifts my kids (now adults)told me that they could finally sleep. I asked them why and I found out that they would take turns staying up because they were afraid I would get hurt at work or have an accident and not come home. I cried because I had no idea that they had been so afraid for me.

Many hours of our lives are spent at work and our stress and sadness can have profound effects on one another.

I have great respect and admoration for my co workers and watching the sadness in their eyes hurts .

I am sure that in each persons own way they will heal but until such time I will continue to look into their eyes and offer them kind and encouraging words, hugs, prayers and hopefully random acts of kindness will restore some of our belief in humanity.

I wrote an email to my pastor I need words of encouragement and prayer. Sometimes around every corner lurks something or someone to test faith and strength.

Listen to peoples eyes. The eyes tell stories of pain, sadness , despair, love, hope and joy.
Tears cleanse our soul and help drain the sorrow from our hearts.
Cry , Pray , Scream whatever it takes to know that God did not bring us to the edge of a cliff and let us drop off.
My co workers are hurting and I am praying.